While I’m going through all the bills that need to be paid this month, it dawned on me that I’m indeed a grown up person, which means I should be equipped with all the pressures and responsibilities of being an adult, adjusting to married life included.
When I was a teener I dreamed of owning my own place, a place free from parental authority, a place where I can do as I please. Then I got married and finally I was out of the house. But settling into my “freedom”, I realized that I had to pay the price. I don’t have a curfew but I have to be home early to cook. I have an option not to clean up, but I need to. No matter how tired I am, I still need to get up to go to work. Well I can’t always call in sick when I don’t feel like coming to work, can I? I guess life did not change after all.
I realized it takes more than just a responsibility to be an adult. It sometimes mean making more decisions than I can handle in a day. What to buy for groceries, what to cook for breakfast, lunch and dinner, what to wear for work, what hubby would wear to work, when to do the laundry, what hubby would like to eat, which tv program to watch to unwind, what to do over the weekend, how much money to save, and the list goes on and on. When I was with my parents, I seldom think about these things. My mom deals with everything, and I’m just there waiting for what she’s gonna ask me to do.
Now I miss home. I miss the parental authority that gave me the feeling of home. Sometimes I wonder how it would have been if my parents are still responsible for all the decisions I make. Maybe, just maybe, life will not always be as tough.
